Is it Haram to date at 13? The flute of great truth

Suhel Ahmad

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Is it Haram to date at 13

The age of 13 is an extraordinary time for teenagers. At this age, their minds want to do many things that they find unacceptable to themselves as adults. One such topic is – Is it Haram to date at 13?

In Islam, there is a distinction between the provision of an adult male youth and a minor male youth. What adults do is sinful, and minors are not evil in many cases.

However, the education a teenager receives at the age of 13-14 has an impact later in life. So, if a 13-year-old gets used to dating, it will affect him later in life.

Is it Haram to date at 13?

Yes, it is Haram to date at 13. Age has nothing to do with dating Haram. Haram and Halal are clear in Islam. What is Haram is Haram for everyone. However, if a minor sins, the level of that sin is not the same as that of an adult. But based on this, dating at age 13 will not be halal.

Meanwhile, Muslim boys and girls become adults in many countries at the age of 13. Although in some cases, at age 15, boys and girls in many countries become adults. It is forbidden for every adult boy or girl to date anyone before marriage.

Also, if a child is not an adult at 13, dating at this age is Haram. Because dating is forbidden in the Quran and Hadith. And in Islam, what is prohibited for adults is also prohibited for children.

Why is the date haram at 13?

Is it Haram to date at 13
Is it Haram to date at 13

The main reason why dating at age 13 is Haram is that it is Haram in the Quran and Hadith. Moreover, those who date at this age have a different mind and brain; they do not have the experience to understand whether their decisions will benefit or harm them.

Actions they take at this age can create crises later in life. That is why dating at the age of 13 is forbidden.

There are many situations in human life where, after facing the situation, man thinks this decision is correct. Still, later, he realizes that his decision was pointless and harmful.

At 13, they may become impulsive, go on dates, get involved in relationships, and indulge in many sins, leading their lives to ruin. But Islam always wants to protect and guide us to a path of peace.

Evidence of Date Haram in 13

In the eyes of Islam, the so-called relationship or love relationship outside of marriage is entirely Haram. Lustful talk, private meetings, dating, chatting, touching, laughing, and mischief with each other are prohibited.
This relationship is a trap of Satan. Falling into this trap, both men and women rush towards Jina – with dire consequences.

So Almighty Allah has forbidden us to come near Jina. Allah says:

“And don’t even go to Gina. Indeed, it is an indecent act and an evil way.” (Surah Isra: 32)

How do you protect yourself from Haram dating?

The Merciful Allah has allowed us to express our love and fulfill our biological needs through marriage through legal means. Therefore, people must marry according to the law of Allah without entering into haram relations before marriage.

And even though dating (illegal love) is Haram and a cause of sin, it is not a sin like shirk, kufr, or apostasy, because of which all his deeds will be nullified or his deeds will not be accepted. Instead, even in this situation, his prayers, dua, and recitation of the Quran will not be wasted.

Allah instructs us to repent from all kinds of wrongdoing.

“O believers, repent to Allah Ta’ala with sincere repentance. Hopefully, your Lord will forgive your evil deeds and admit you to Paradise beneath which rivers flow. (Surah Tahreem: 8)

Tawbaye Nasuha means pure and pure repentance and sincere and sincere repentance. That is, to repent with such sincerity and conviction that the repentant will never knowingly indulge in that sin again.

Is dating at 13 always Haram?

No, it is not always Haram to date at 13, but Islam allows her to marry when she reaches adulthood. He must get married. If she is independent and physically strong, then she should be married.

And he will be able to date his particular bride at the time of marriage. The conditions for this are that the families of both the bride and the groom agree and that they talk in an open place, not engaging in haram activities there.

Age of Adulthood in Islam

Islam prescribes the age limit and signs of adulthood for both boys and girls. A boy or a girl is considered an adult when certain signs of puberty are found or a specific age limit is reached. From then on, the rules of Islamic Shariat will be entrusted to him. The signs of puberty in boys are:

(a) Being a dreamer.
(b) Water out.
(c) Growing a beard or goatee.

The signs of puberty in girls are:

(a) Being a dreamer.
(b) Menstruation.
(c) Impregnation.
(d) Breast enlargement, etc.

If the above-specified signs of adulthood are not found in a boy or a girl, then when both of them complete 15 years of Hijri year, each will be considered an adult. After completing 15 years, even if no symptoms are found, he will be considered an adult. (Al Inaya Sharhul Hedaya 8/201; Addurrul Mukhtar 6/153; Tafseer Qurtubi 12/151)

So, since we see boys and girls not becoming adults at age 13, they can’t accept the legitimate way of dating. Instead, dating is forbidden for them in all circumstances.


What factors influence whether dating at age 13 is Haram?

Islamic culture and teachings, the Quran and Hadith, and personal family values all play a role in determining whether dating is Haram at the age of 13. Different Islamic sects have no room for other opinions on this matter.

Are there exceptions or differences of opinion in the Muslim community?

No, there is no difference of opinion among Muslims about dating. Islam has open communication and guidance about relationships. It should be for marriage and family purposes.

What should parents consider when dating at 13?

Parents should consider their children’s emotional and social maturity, the cultural and religious values they wish to instill, and the potential impact on their child’s overall well-being. Open communication and education are crucial in healthy relationships.

How can individuals and families navigate these concerns?

Families can be open and discuss relationships, values, and expectations. Guidance from religious leaders or scholars can also provide insight into navigating the balance between cultural norms and personal preferences.

When is dating Halal?

Islamic teachings guide people to marry when they are physically, mentally, and financially capable. So, dating during marriage is halal for specific purposes and conditions.

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